Those Bright Blue Eyes
by MysterySolver0706
Summary: What if Sherlock and John had met as teenagers? John is starting his 11th year in high school and is instantly mesmerized by a tall, curly-haired, mysterious boy. John has to deal with his family problems, contemplate his sexuality, and find out if he truly believes in love at first sight. Sherlock is experiencing problems as well- self-harm, drugs, and worst of all.. his feelings.
1. Just Some Boy

"Hurry up, Harry! We're going to be late!" I say, throwing my backpack onto my shoulders.

"I know, John! I'm coming!" she replies, running down the stairs.

The beginning of the school year is always hectic at the Watson household. I'm going into eleventh grade, and Harry- my older sister- is going into twelfth. She's been boasting ever since the beginning of summer holiday that she's going to be leaving home soon. I can't wait for her to go. We aren't the best of friends; we barely even speak to each other.

I am dreading walking to the bus stop with Harry every day this year. Mike, one of my good friends, used to walk with me; but he moved away this summer.

When we get on the bus, Harry immediately drifts off and goes to sit with her friends. I don't mind. I sit toward the front of the bus by myself. I take out my iPod, and start listening to music. I glance at the seat next to me and see another boy sitting alone. He has dark curly hair, and is wearing a dark colored hoodie, skinny jeans, and black converse sneakers. He is looking out of the window, hands in his pockets.

He looks lonely.

I turn my head back around, aware now that I am staring. I have never seen him before. '_Is he new?_' I think to myself.

I dare to take another look at him- but when I turn my head I find that he is looking over at me too. Neither one of us say a word. Now that I can see his face, I realize that he is drop-dead gorgeous. He looks like he could be a model.

His eyes are so blue.

I blush and turn away from him completely. '_Pull yourself together, John. He's going to think you're weird!_' I keep my eyes on the window next to me rest of the bus ride to school. The boy never utters a word to me.

I don't even know his name.

All throughout the school day, I ask my friends about him. He is quite a mystery; not many people know who he is or where he came from. The few people who had a class with him all responded in the same way:

"Oh, Freak? Yeah, I know him."

"Why do you call him that?" I would ask.

"He's really weird. He can tell you your whole life story in two seconds. It's fucking creepy…"

During lunch, I prayed that I would have at least one class with him in the second half of the day. '_Why am I doing this?_' I think. '_It's just some boy… A really gorgeous one…_' As I think this, I notice him sitting in the back corner of the lunch room by himself. I decide to go over and talk to him.

"Um.. Hello. I'm John." I sit down in the seat directly across from him. He looks up at me with his huge blue eyes; he looks surprised that a human being willingly chose to sit next to him and talk to him.

"I know." He says, startling me with how deep his voice is. His eyebrows furrow as he looks at me- he looks lost in thought. "Interesting… eleventh grade, captain of the rugby team, single, bad relations with older brother."

"What's your name?" I ask, completely avoiding the fact that he'd gotten most of that information right.

"Don't you already know?"

"No, I don't… actually-"

"I know people are talking about me."

"Don't worry about them. They just like picking on the new kids."

"Sherlock."

"What?"

"That's my name."

"Sherlock? That's a cool name." I say with a smile. '_John, that was so lame! You're going to embarrass yourself!_'

"Oh. Thank you."

"Yeah, I'm John." '_Fuck. I said that already. No. Do over. Fuck._'

"Is something wrong?" Sherlock asks, tilting his head slightly to the side.

"No! Nothing's wrong. I… sorry."

"It's quite alright, John."

I suddenly realize that he doesn't have anything to eat.

"You aren't eating anything." I say.

"I'm not hungry. Why should I be eating if I'm not hungry?"

"No, I just… I just thought you might need something to get through the day."

"I'm fine, thank you." Sherlock then turns toward his open book and starts reading again; he's completely forgotten me.

"Am I… bothering you?" I ask.

"No, of course not." He looks up from his book. "It's nice to have someone to sit with. People usually don't want to associate with me."

"Why not?"

"I'm different."

"You seem pretty normal to me." I say, smiling.

"You wouldn't understand." He says, letting me know I've hit a touchy subject.

"So… what kind of books do you like?"

"Are you trying to make conversation?"

"Um.. I think so…"

Sherlock chuckles at that, which makes my stomach fill up with butterflies. '_John. Stop it. You're not gay!_'

"I like detective stories. Mysteries. Ones filled with adventure."

"I like fantasy books." I reply.

Sherlock doesn't respond at first, but then looks me right in the eyes. "Aren't you going to eat?"

I've been so distracted by Sherlock that I'd forgotten I had a lunch tray in front of me. Surprised, I start eating just as the bell rings for next period. As students get up and leave around us, Sherlock stays put.

"Sherlock, aren't you going to class?"

"I'm skipping this period."

"Why? It's the first day."

"I know."

"But-"

"Care to join me?"

"Sure." I say quickly, not giving my brain a chance to think it through.

He suddenly grabs my hand and whispers, "Follow me."

We run through the lunch room doors and outside onto the basketball courts. We run around the side of the school building until we find ourselves in a dark alleyway between the high school and middle school buildings. There's a fence blocking our way to the main road, and I can see the buses parked along the curb. I'm out of breath, and I let go of his hand and slide to the ground. He sits down next to me.

'_His hand was so warm…_'

I resist the strong urge to lay my head down on his shoulder, and just sit with my head against the wall.

"Aren't we going to get caught?"

"No."

"How did you know where to go? Isn't this your first day here?"

"Yes, but I figured out the school layout as soon as I got here this morning."

"Are you a genius or something?" I ask.

He laughs. "No. I just deduce things about everything and everyone-"

"Like you did with me a couple minutes ago? By the way, how did you do that?"

"It was very simple really; the subjects of the schoolbooks you were carrying were junior material, which let me know what grade you are in. You are wearing a rugby sports jacket- a fairly obvious sign that you play the sport- but only captains have the accented red color on the emblem and buttons; regular players have blue."

"How did you know I'm single?"

"Easy really; during lunch you chose to sit alone- and then with me- instead of sitting with a girlfriend. She could have been absent today, but single is more likely-"

"You keep saying 'she'."

"Oh." Sherlock immediately stops talking and turns away from me. "So, you've got a boyfriend then," he continues.

"No, I don't." I answer.

"Ah." Sherlock doesn't say another word, and instead pulls a cigarette from his pocket.

"Sherlock, you smoke?"

"Yes." He quickly lights it, and sends a puff of smoke into the air shortly afterwards.

"Sherlock… Do you have a girlfriend?"

"Girlfriend, no. Not really my area."

"Do you have a boyfriend? Which is fine, by the way-"

"I know it's fine."

"Right. Ok. So you're unattached, like me. Good."

We are so close, I can feel his body heat. My heart begins to beat faster and faster until I can't take it anymore. I exhale shakily, and Sherlock notices.

"Are you alright?"

"Yes.. I'm fine."

"Ok."

"Sherlock… What's your next class?"

"Chemistry. Why?"

"I have chemistry!"

"You… do?"

"Yep! We should be getting back now… I don't want to get in trouble."

"Alright." He stands back up, offering me his hand to help me up as well. I realize that I am blushing as he takes my hand. '_I don't want him to let go…_' I think. I look down at our hands linked together and smile. Sherlock bites his lip and looks away from me.

"John… I…" Sherlock quickly lets go of my hand and sprints off in the direction of the school.

"Sherlock!" I yell, but it's too late.

He's gone.


	2. You, Only You

The next couple of days are absolutely miserable. I don't want to move or eat, and I can't even sleep without seeing his face.

Sherlock isn't here- and it's making me sick.

He doesn't show up to school the rest of the week. No one knows where he went. I asked my chemistry teacher where he might be, but he hasn't heard from Sherlock's parents at all.

I'm starting to get worried.

I wake up Sunday morning and check my email. '_Nothing interesting, as usual…_' I think, until I see an email titled, '_John_' sitting in my inbox. The sender is titled '_ScienceofDeduction243_', so I assume it's Sherlock. My heart leaps in my chest. '_How did he get my email? Never mind.. it's him!_' I think, excitedly.

The email reads:

John,

I need to talk to you.

Meet me at the park by your house.

Now, please.

-SH

I quickly put on jeans and a t-shirt, heart pounding frantically and almost painfully against my ribcage. I run out my front door and sprint to the park. I see Sherlock leaning against the lonely lamppost. The sun hasn't risen yet, so I shiver as I approach him.

"Sherlock?"

He turns toward me, and stays silent as I walk closer and closer. The sun has barely risen, and the sky is pink and yellow. I hear every crunch of gravel under my feet as I get even closer.

Sherlock still hasn't said anything.

"Sherlock… Are you okay?"

When I am close enough, Sherlock takes my hand in both of his. I turn red at the touch. '_His hands are so warm…_'

"John…"

His voice is so deep.

"…yes?"

"I can't stop thinking about you… About.. this…"

"Sherlock…"

"I thought about this endlessly these past five days… I _needed_ to hold your hand again… I don't know why… I haven't been able to think about anything else but you…"

"Sherlock… I've been worried sick about you."

"You… were _worried_?"

"Of course. When you didn't show up to school, I was worried that something happened to you… I thought I did something wrong-"

"You could never do anything wrong, John."

"Sherlock… Without you there I felt… _sick_."

"You…" He laces our fingers together and leads me to a bench. I shiver again, and Sherlock pulls me closer to him.

"John… I don't know what I feel about you. But… I _need_ you in my life. I can't explain it… I've never felt this way about anyone before…"

I don't say anything, and neither does he. We sit and watch the sunrise together. Eventually, I realize that I have to go back home.

"Sherlock… Promise me that you will come back to school tomorrow. I… don't think I could stand it if you didn't."

"I will."

'_I don't want to let go…_'

We stand up slowly. I don't know what I feel about this boy, but I feel like this is the start of something beautiful. We've only known each other for a couple days, but it feels like an eternity. We've only spoken a couple times… but.. even so… Looking into his eyes then seals it for me. His eyes… They are oceans of pure blue.. I can see the raw emotion in them, they convey more than words can express. They tell me that there is a deeper story, a sadder story, behind them. I can tell Sherlock has been through hell, but it has made him the person he is now. It has made him beautiful. I don't know why he has chosen me, but I will try my absolute best to make this wonderful for him.

I find his other hand, and link our fingers together. I am standing right in front of him. '_He's so tall…_' I think.

"I'm cold.." I say.

"John…"

I lean my head against his chest. '_He smells nice…_' I think. I can feel him rest his chin on top of my head.

"I have to go, Sherlock…"

"I know. But… I don't want you to go…"

"You could come to my house." I suggest.

"This early?"

"Yes. Sherlock.. I want to ask you questions. I want to know everything about you. I want to know all your favorite things, your family, your past… Everything…"

"John. You don't want anything to do with me.. I'm broken…"

"I don't care."

"John… Oh, John…"

"Come home with me."

"Okay."

'_I used to think I wasn't gay…_'

I was brought up by parents who thought being gay was an abomination. A disgrace. They thought that it was something that could be cured- something that could be taken away. I personally didn't think so. You were born with it. Sure, I like girls, and that's what I was brought up to like. It's what my parents considered normal. It was socially acceptable.. But…

'_I used to think I was straight._'

I considered being bi. I considered everything. Except...

'_What am I now?_'


	3. Not Ready Yet

I lead Sherlock to my room upstairs. We are still holding hands.

"John.. Where are your parents?"

"They're both out of town."

"Ah, I see."

We arrive in my room, a very small cramped space filled by a single bed. Sherlock and I sit down, silently, and I am already at a loss for words.

"John, this was a mistake.. I'm sorry-" He gets up to leave.

"What? No! You can't go yet.."

"John, this is… I'm not…"

"You're not what?"

"I'm not ready for something like this…"

"Okay, sure, you're not ready.. So I won't push it." I let go of his hand.

"John-"

"We'll start as being friends."

"I've disappointed you." He says, ruffling his curly hair with his other hand. The hand I was holding a second ago remains lifeless on the bed; unmoving.

"No, it's ok." I say, already moving farther away from him.

"John… You don't have to do that.. I…"

"You what? You're not comfortable around me, in my house, and I get it. I _understand_."

"You're mad."

"Mad about _what_?" I can already sense the anger rising in my voice. I can feel a lump in my throat.

"About this. _All_ of this."

"I'm not mad.. I just thought we were going somewhere…"

"We are. John… I just need some time…"

"Okay. Sherlock?"

"Hmm?"

"What's your last name?"

"Holmes."

"Oh."

"Is there.. a problem?"

"No! Of course not. It sounds very mature."

"What's yours?"

"Watson. John Hamish Watson."

"William Sherlock Scott Holmes."

"That's a mouthful." I say, smiling.

Sherlock gives me a skeptical look, so I lightly punch his arm.

"I'm kidding, Sher. Don't get upset."

"You… you just-"

"Oh, sorry. I didn't mean to call you that-"

"It's okay, John. I like it."

I look up at him then, completely mesmerized by his eyes and.. well, his entire face. He has high cheekbones and a very defined cupids bow. Unconsciously, I lick my lips- immediately regretting it afterward. '_God… I know I like him… but this fast? I just met him a couple days ago! But… I've missed him ever since.._'

I blush a dark red color as I realize his eyes haven't moved from mine. His gaze seems fixed on me, like I am the only thing that ever mattered. He scoots closer to me on the bed, raising his hand to move the hair away from my forehead; his fingers lightly brushing over my skin.

And just like that, I fell in love. Hard.

It hits me like a ton of bricks. My heart leaps in my chest, my palms get sweaty, and I can barely breathe. The way he looks at me tears me apart. I can tell he isn't used to this, and neither am I.

He made no other move to touch me, he just sat there running his fingers through my short blonde hair. After a while, I reach out and intertwine our fingers together once more. Closing my eyes, I lean forward and rest my head on his shoulder.

"John…" I hear him whisper.

At some point I fall asleep.


	4. I'm Missing You

Sherlock doesn't come back to school the next day.

Sherlock doesn't come to school that week.

Or the week after.

'_Sherlock… Sherlock… Come back to me…_'

'_Come back…_'

'_Sherlock…_'

'_I need to see you…_'

I get an email one Saturday night from ScienceofDeduction243. '_What the hell…_' I think as I open it.

John,

Something is wrong.

Please.

Help me.

-SH

I email him back:

Sherlock,

Where are you? Is it an emergency?

-John

A few minutes after I hit send, an email from Sherlock pops up in my inbox.

John,

Meet me at the park.

Please.

Hurry.

-SH

I quickly put on a jacket and run to the door, only to be stopped by Harry.

"Harry. Move."

"Where are you going?"

"Out."

"John, I've been worried about you."

"You? Worried about me?"

"Yes. You never eat, I don't see you anymore because you lock yourself in your room… Is everything okay?"

"No. It's not. Now, if you'll excuse me-"

I push past her, open the door, and run off into the night. The street lamps have all turned on, illuminating the darkness and providing me with some light to find the park. When I get there, the bench is empty, and the entire street is dark and cold. There is no one around.

"Sherlock…" I sit down on the bench, covering my mouth with my hand. I shut my eyes tight. '_I'm not going to cry… I'm not going to cry… I'm not-_'

I look up quickly at the sound of footsteps. I look to my right, and there he is. Sherlock. He is walking slowly toward me. I stand up and run to him.

"Sherlock!" I yell.

When I get to him, I wrap my arms around him tight.

"Sherlock! What the hell?! Where did you go? I was worried sick! Don't do that to me ever again!"

"John…"

He's so quiet. I can feel his hands grip the back of my jacket tightly, as he buries his face in my chest. I feel him shaking in my arms.

"Sher… Are you okay?"

"…no…" It's quiet; almost a whisper.

I lead him to the bench- '_He's shaking terribly. What… happened?_' When he sits down, he doesn't look at me. He doesn't show his face. I gently lift his face toward me, and I see them. The cuts. The bruises. The red marks. They are all over his face. He has a black eye, a severe cut on his cheek that is bleeding, and a split lip.

"Sherlock… What happened to you?"

"There's something you should know about me, John."

"…yes?"

"I'm… I'm addicted-"

As soon as the word escapes his lips I pull him into a tight hug.

"John… I do all sorts of drugs…"

"Sherlock-"

"I… I associate myself with bad people. During these past two weeks I have taken more than I ever have.. Today, I went to get more- because I ran out- and I got into a fight…"

"Sherlock… Why do you take drugs?"

"To get away… I want to get far away from here."

"Why?"

"I can't stand living with my family. With my brother. It's… too much…"

"Sherlock, I can't stand my sister either- but that doesn't mean you should do this to yourself."

"Sister. You have a sister…"

"Yeah, so?"

"There's always something…"

"What do you mean?"

"I didn't get everything right about you."

"You mean your deduction? I'm focusing on now. Do you have any more injuries?"

"Yeah. I think I have a broken rib. It hurts like hell…"

"Oh, God.. Sherlock, you should rest… Why didn't you tell me in your email? You could have stayed home… You didn't have to come here."

"That's the problem.. I haven't been home."

"What?"

"After you fell asleep at your house that morning, I left and never went back home. Well, I got my laptop, but that's all I brought with me."

"Sherlock, you mean to tell me you haven't been home in two weeks?!"

"Yes."

"But, your parents must be worried sick about you!"

"They don't care. No one does. _No one_ cares whether I live or die…"

"I do. _I_ care." I say, wrapping my arms tighter around him. "Sherlock.. Stay with me. At my house. Please."

"But, John.. Won't your parents be mad?"

"Not if I explain it to them. You're my friend, I can't just leave you out here like this."

"John-"

"It's what best friends do, isn't it? Take care of each other."

"So… in fact… I'm your… best friend?"

"Yeah, of course you are. Of course.. you're my best friend."

"Even after… all this?"

"Yes. Absolutely."

We sit there in silence, not knowing what to say next. I want Sherlock to be okay, but him living in my house? With Harry around? It's a disaster waiting to happen… But Sherlock sleeping in my room… In my bed…

"John… You haven't eaten."

"Sherlock…"

He raises his head and looks at me again. His eyes are full of tears. '_Is he in that much pain?_'

"You haven't had a good night's sleep in days… You've had nightmares…"

"They've all been about you…" I admit.

"What?"

"My nightmares… They're about bad things happening to you, and I can't stop it. I can't stop your pain… I can't get the images out of my head…"

"John. You were _that_ worried?"

"…yes."

"John… From the moment I laid eyes on you, I knew you would change my life. I knew you would become a part of it and I would never be able to stop thinking about you… Since the first day of school I've never been able to keep you out of my thoughts.. You're kindness and happy spirit has been plaguing my mind ever since that day…"

"Sherlock-"

"I always want to be around you, with you… I have been dying to hear your voice…"

"Then why haven't you come to school?"

"I wasn't at home, and I didn't have my school things… With the drugs destroying my mind bit by bit, I just… couldn't go."

"Sherlock, I'm here now. And I will always be. So… don't go back to them okay? For me."

"Okay…"

"Sherlock… I want to tell you something.. I… I…" My mouth becomes dry as I begin to say these words. The words that have been on my mind since the first day I met him. '_I need to say it.._' I think. "I… love you."

"John… You don't know what you're saying-"

"Yes I do!"

"You're saying you want to spend more time with me.. but I can't let that happen."

"Why not?"

"I'm dangerous."

"Sherlock. Look at me." He does, and I feel the butterflies fluttering in my stomach again. I need to let him know that I don't care about the drugs. I don't care about the danger or any of the other factors keeping us apart. I don't care that we've both never done this before. I don't care that we're both nervous and scared to death. I don't care that we're both so confused about what we want and don't want. I don't care that we've known each other for so little time. I don't care that we're both boys. All I know is that I'm so crazy about him that it's going to drive me insane. I want him, only him, right now and forever.

I don't know what I'm doing. I know my parents won't approve of this, and Harry will yell at me, and I am probably digging myself into a hole that I will never be able to get out of… But even so… I look at him then, and the universe stops just for us.

And I kiss him.


	5. Both Our Scars

We enter the house quickly and quietly, trying not to alert Harry that we're here. Sherlock looks around, as I find the medical supplies. As I start to walk up the stairs, I feel Sherlock's fingers intertwine with mine. I smile at the gentle touch, though Sherlock hasn't said a word as we entered the house.

We creep past Harry's open bedroom door, and into my room. "Sherlock-" I whisper.

"She's asleep." Sherlock replies.

"Oh. That's good then." I say in response. Sherlock ruffles his curls with his other hand, which makes me blush.

"I… I, umm…"

Sherlock smirks at me, and quickly kisses my nose. "Aren't you going to patch me up?"

I stand still, shocked for a moment, before coming back to reality. "Oh! Yeah, sorry…"

Sherlock sits down on my bed, and I- for once- am taller than him. I start cleaning the cuts on his face, and he winces a little as I do so.

"Sorry…" I whisper.

I clean the blood and dirt from his face, pausing to move the hair away from his forehead with my fingers. I move slowly, barely touching his skin. His eyes close, and for a second I could swear he stopped breathing.

"Sherlock…" I whisper, moving closer.

He doesn't open his eyes as I move in to kiss him. I place my hands, delicately and gently, on either side of his neck.

We are so close now.

"John…" He breathes my name onto my lips. His voice alone is enough to drive me crazy, but whispering it… God help me…

I kiss him then, gently. We take our time, and move slowly. I can't explain it, but we seemed to move as one. It's like we knew each other's movements so well already. It wasn't awkward, like first kisses usually are. It was almost like we fit together.

We were meant for each other.

I break away from the kiss and just look at him. '_His face looks so peaceful right now._' I reach for the bottom of his shirt and try to lift it over his head. His eyes open in surprise as I do so.

"John." He says sternly.

"I have to check your ribcage, Sherlock. I need to see if you've broken anything-"

"Can't you do that with my shirt on?"

"Sherlock. Please."

"John… I-"

I eventually have my way, and take his shirt off. I toss it on the floor by my bed, and get ready to inspect him. I am shocked by what I see. He is scarred. '_Self harm._' I realize. He has scars on his wrists and chest too. He has even written '**FREAK**' in big capitol letters across his arm. They don't look like they're deep, but they have all left marks. I notice that there are places on his arm where I know he has injected himself with God knows what drug. I also see the bruises left by the fight he was in earlier.

"Sherlock…"

It scares me to think that he has used his body like some sort of deadly canvas. I scares me to think that he has done all this to himself. It scares me to think that he cares for himself so little.

I don't know what to say.

"John."

I don't respond. I just stand up and look at him. What I see is a high school student, about 16 years old, who has done unspeakable things to himself. I close my eyes tight, and when I open them I see someone new. I see a beautiful, brilliant, caring, broken boy who I have fallen in love with. I see someone I care about so deeply- someone I couldn't possibly live without. And it kills me to know that he doesn't see any of that. Quickly, I take off my shirt too. He stares at me, confused, before he finally notices.

I am scarred too.

"Sherlock…" It is all I can say. It is all I want to say.

Sherlock stands up, hands shaking. "John.. You…" He lightly traces the scar that runs across my chest with his finger.

"You're not the only one who knows the things depression can make you do."

Suddenly, Sherlock starts to cry.

"Sherlock, are you in pain? Are you ok?" I ask him.

His hands are covering his face, so his next words come out muffled- but they manage to break my heart anyway.

"I love you… I love you so much, John…"

I remove his hands from his tear-streaked face, and kiss him again. His hands are quickly at my waist as he presses me against the wall. We are insistent this time, moving quickly with a hunger for each other that I have never felt before. My hands are in his hair- and soon, my lips are on his neck.

"J-john…"

"Sherlock.. Is your chest hurting?"

"A bit. It's just a fractured rib though- it'll heal."

We kiss again, and my heart swells. I start to move him toward my bed, and he complies. I pull him down so that he is lying on top of me.

"Sherlock, are you going to sleep with me tonight?" I say, out of breath.

"Yes, of course. Where else would I go?"

"I just didn't know how you felt about sharing a bed with me-"

"John. I love you, and I do not wish to be anywhere else."

"Ok." I smile.

"John, if it's alright with you, I think I might retire now."

"Oh, ok. Sure. You're probably tired."

"Yes, I am."

We get up and walk toward my closet. I try to find something of mine that Sherlock could wear, and also pick my favorite pajama pants. I hand the garments to Sherlock as I look out my door.

"John, what are you doing?"

"Checking for Harry."

"Why?"

"Because I need to be sure she isn't in the bathroom.."

"Why do you care?"

"Because…" I don't tell him that I don't feel comfortable changing next to him in the same room.

"John." He says softly.

"Yes?" I turn around, and Sherlock is standing there in just his underwear.

"You don't have a problem with me being here while you change, do you?"

For a second, my brain is unable to focus and I completely forget the entire English language. Sherlock smirks at me.

"I.. umm.. I… Well…"

"…yes?"

"No, there's no problem." I shut the door behind me, without making much sound. I then stand there watching Sherlock put on my pajama pants. The act alone is enough to make me flustered. I quickly take off my jeans, slip into my night ware, and join him in bed.

I turn toward him, and he turns to face me. We just lie there staring at each other. He reaches out and runs his fingers through my hair.

"John… I've completely fallen for you."

"Sherlock…" I wrap both my arms around him, and he snuggles up to me.

"John.. I will never, ever want to be in anyone's arms but yours."

"The same goes for me, Sherlock." I say.

"What will we do in the morning?" He asks.

"We need to leave the house before Harry wakes up. We could spend the day somewhere.. I don't know where you'd want to go-"

"Baker Street."

"Baker Street? Why there?"

"There is a nice little cafe there called Speedy's. We could go there on a.. a…"

"Date?"

There is a long silence before he speaks again.

"Yes… That would be nice."

"It's a plan then." I say smiling. I kiss the top of his head, briefly burrowing my face in his head of curls.

"Goodnight, Sherlock."

"John."

"Hm?"

Sherlock moves so that he is facing me and kisses me properly. The kiss is passionate- not wild and passion-driven- but has me gasping for breath at the end.

"Goodnight, John Watson."

"God, Sherlock.. You will be the death of me…"

Sherlock laughs quietly, and I think, '_His smile can light up a room…_' He kisses me quickly on the cheek, and then we both turn in for the night.


	6. A Perfect Fit

The next morning, I wake up to the feeling of someone shaking me.

"John. John, wake up." Sherlock whispers.

"Wha- what are you doing?"

"Your sister is awake."

"Fuck."

"My thoughts exactly." Sherlock replies.

"What are we going to do?"

"I heard her make her way downstairs. We need to dress quickly and jump out of your window-"

"My window? That's a bit dramatic.." I sigh, sitting up.

"John…" Sherlock says, resting his forehead on my shoulder. "Please."

"Ok. But you better know what you're doing. I don't want you to hurt yourself."

"I promise."

Our hands find each other again, and I feel Sherlock's other hand loosely tangling itself in my hair.

"Sherlock…" I mumble.

"Mm?" Sherlock moves his head to look at me- making me feel weak with his piercing gaze.

I kiss him then, gently- feeling his body's radiating heat from our closeness and his pounding heartbeat. Sherlock opens his mouth, allowing me access inside. As our tongues touch for the first time, Sherlock's arms wrap around my neck- pulling me closer. We fall backward onto the bed tangling our legs together as we continue to kiss passionately- completely unaware the door was being opened slightly, and Harry was looking in. The only way we knew she was there at all was because of the sound of the door closing shut.

"Sherlock."

"Yes?"

"That was Harry."

Sherlock moves his arms so he is able to sit up on his elbows, and I take that as a cue to get off him.

"Sherlock. She knows about us now."

"And?"

"_And_, I'm going to get in trouble. She's going to tell my parents… and… I might not be able to see you anymore." I say, shakily. '_My parents are going to KILL me._'

"Why would she tell your parents?"

"Because she doesn't like me, and she doesn't like-" I stop myself before I can say the word 'gays'.

Sherlock looks at me with his head turned slightly to the side, like he's thinking.

"She doesn't like…" Sherlock starts, wanting me to finish.

"She doesn't like gay people. Neither do my parents. That's what they preach around here. That's why she would tell them, 'John has a boy sleeping in his bed,'."

"No she wouldn't."

"Why not?" I say, growing irritated.

"Because she is gay as well. At least, that's what I've deduced."

"Wait. She's… what? And how were you able to deduce her?"

"I might've snuck into her room last night while you were both sleeping.."

"Really, Sherlock? Jesus…"

"Yes. It turns out, she's been sleeping with a couple girls while you were completely unaware."

"And how do you know this?"

"Her phone. Her password was not hard to figure out- so once I got in, she has a contact labeled as just 'Her'; indicating that she wants to keep the identity of that person a secret. Also, under her bed was a piece of bright pink underwear-"

"Sherlock…" I mumble.

"-but it doesn't match any of the other's in Harry's drawer, so it must belong to someone else. A friend could have left it, but do close friends undress in front of each other? No. So, logically, she's been sleeping with another girl. Now, you could say she's bisexual, but there is no evidence of any guy-"

"Stop. Just, stop it. I don't want to know."

"But you just asked me how I knew." Sherlock bites his lip, but continues to stare at me.

"Yes, ok, I did. But.. My parents are going to kill both of us if they find out.."

"They aren't going to find out." Sherlock replies.

"Sherlock…"

"John. I am going to keep you from getting in harm's way no matter what."

"Thank you."

"Now, should we be getting dressed?"

"Oh, yeah, of course."

"Are you sure? You seem.. a bit dazed."

"No. I'm fine."

"You don't sound fine."

"Sherlock.. I'm just stressed out, ok? I didn't want Harry, of all people, to know about this.. but now she does, and there's nothing I can do about it."

"You're acting like I'm just you're little secret." Sherlock says, standing up and walking toward the closet.

"What if you are?"

"What if I don't want to be?" Sherlock snaps.

I'm shocked at this, so I decide to keep my mouth shut.

"What if I want to scream to the world that you are mine, and I am yours? What if I want both our parents to know about what we have? What if I want them to know that there is nothing they can do to stop us being separated. What about what I want, John?"

"Sherlock, this just sounds like you want to get back at your parents.. for something."

Sherlock turns away from me then, sighing in frustration. I can see him clenching and unclenching his fists. '_What have I done?_' I think.

"My parents hate me. My brother hates me. I hate myself, too. I want them to see that I can be happy with someone else. I want to show them that one person believes in me and appreciates me. John.. You are my everything…"

I walk up behind him, pulling him into a hug- burying my face into his back.

"I love you." I say softly.

"John.."

"I do. I really do. I don't care what society thinks, what our parents think, or even what my friends might think. I want to come out with you, Sherlock. I really do. But.."

"There's always a 'but'." Sherlock mumbles.

"I'm just afraid, Sherlock."

"Are you.. ashamed of being with me? Is that why you want to remain a secret?" Sherlock says, the pain clearly present in his voice.

"Sherlock. I just need time to think, ok? Maybe loosen my parents up a little first. I don't know… I just don't want to spring it on them unexpectedly."

"Sounds reasonable."

"Maybe we could just… wait? Just for a little while. Then we can shout it to the world as much as you like." I smile.

"..ok." Sherlock agrees.

"Now, are we going to go on that date, or what?" I say smirking.

Sherlock turns around as I let go of him, and puts his hands on either side of my face.

"Not without a quick kiss first." He says, quietly.

Sherlock kisses me on the lips passionately- then, wrapping his arms around my waist, picks me up and spins me around.

"Sherlock! Oh my God!" I exclaim; giddy with love and excitement, as I hang on to him for dear life.

"I love you so, so much, John Watson."

"Sher.."

He puts me down gently, and immediately leans in toward my neck.

"You're mine… All mine.." he mumbles, as he slowly kisses all the way down my neck- moving the collar of my shirt slightly, to reach the sensitive skin by my collarbone. I gasp at the contact, grabbing the fabric of his shirt tightly. The sensation of his lips on my neck sends shivers down my spine- leaving me wanting more of him.

I want him all around me.

"Sherlock… Jesus…"

"Am I… doing ok?"

"Oh, God, yes… I want… more-"

We move so that I am pressed against the wall; his lips almost touching mine. '_I just want to move so I can kiss him.. God, I just want to stay like this forever.._' I think as Sherlock's blue eyes find mine- trapping me, paralyzing me. I cannot look away as his face takes up my entire field of vision.

"_John.._" His voice is so deep- it is almost as if it has penetrated me right to my very core. I want to hear him say my name over and over again until his voice gives out. I want him to be with me to tell me comforting things, and let me know that everything is going to be all right.

I want to spend my life with him.

As we continue to stand there in peaceful bliss- a breath away from each other- I can feel Sherlock's hands move under my shirt, and I see his eyes begin to close. He rests his forehead against mine, and starts to whisper to me.

"John.. I want you. All of you. Somehow, it was fate that I met you when I did. If you hadn't been on that bus the first day of school.. I don't know if I ever could have been romantically attracted to someone. You are the light in my greying world, and I… I…"

I kiss him then, feeling even more attracted to him than I already was. I need him here, by my side, always. We fit together, Sherlock and I- almost by design.

I cannot picture my future with anyone but him.

'_I need to tell him what I feel.._' I think. '_But I'll save that for the date today.. I just want to enjoy this time I have with him. Because right now, feels like heaven._"


	7. Don't Let Go

We walk into Speedy's hand in hand- the door quietly swinging closed behind us. As I look around, I don't recognize anyone from school.

'_Even if they were here,_' I think to myself. '_I wouldn't care if they saw us together.._'

Sherlock and I pick a booth and I slide onto one of the leather seats. Sherlock sits across from me, placing his hands together under his chin. My breath catches in my throat when I look up at him, staring right at me; studying me.

"John."

"Mm?"

"What do you want?"

"Oh. I.. I don't know.. I haven't been here before."

"Ah." He responds.

"Have you?"

"Yes. It's a nice quiet place to sit and think."

"Oh." I reply.

Seconds tick by agonizingly slow before he responds.

"John. You don't have to do this."

"What do you mean?"

"Go on this.. _date_.. with me."

"But I want to!"

"You.. do?"

"Of course." I say with a smile.

Sherlock doesn't say anything, he just stares past me out the open window.

"Sher?" I ask.

"Yes, John?"

"What's your favorite color?"

Sherlock laughs then- a deep laugh that makes my heart leap in my chest and makes my palms start to sweat.

"Sherlock, I'm serious! What is it?"

"Oh, John."

"What?"

"I love you."

"But that's not your favorite color.." I say teasingly.

He laughs again, crinkles appearing on the sides of his eyes. I lean foreword, placing my elbows on the table.

"What is it?" I ask again.

He opens his eyes to look at me, and his eyes are a very light blue. I can feel his fingers caressing my cheek lightly, and I start to close my eyes. '_I love how easily he can put a spell on me.._' I think.

"It's blue."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"Mine's green."

"Ah. I see. Is this your attempt at conversation?"

"I… I guess-"

Sherlock laughs again; the sound creating thousands of tiny butterflies in my stomach. I sit back down on the other side of the booth.

"John, just be you. Say what you want to say- and if you don't have anything to say, it's alright. I don't want you to try too hard for my sake."

"Oh, alright.."

"I want you to have a good time, John. Don't ever think otherwise."

I rest my hand on the table, and Sherlock takes it in both of his.

"Sher-"

"I love you, John. And if you are not enjoying yourself, we will leave."

"No, Sherlock. I.. I want to stay, ok?"

"Alright." Sherlock says, smiling.

He doesn't let go of my hand.

After a while, Greg Lestrade- an old friend of mine- walks over to take our orders.

"John!"

"Hey, Greg!" I say. "You work here now?" I ask.

"Oh, yeah. I have to, I guess. And.. who's this?"

"This is Sherlock."

Sherlock nods toward Greg, never letting go of my hand.

"You two are.." Greg starts.

"Together." I say, smiling.

"Wow! John, I'm so happy for you!" He says.

"Thanks, Greg."

"So, what will it be for you both?"

After we finish at Speedy's, Sherlock and I walk over to the library. As we browse the shelves, Sherlock finds several books he wants to read. I find one that I haven't read yet- the last in a series of 7 books. We walk over to one of the large couches and sit down. Immediately as he starts reading, Sherlock wraps one of his arms around me. I blush dark red.

"Sher-"

"Should I stop?" Sherlock asks softly.

"No." I say. I kiss him quickly on the cheek and go back to my book. After a couple minutes, however, it became clear to me that I was reading the same sentence over and over again. I sigh, placing the book on my lap. Instead, I look at Sherlock as he reads.

He is a fast reader. He reads with an intense look on his face, as though he is dissecting the book letter by letter. It's fascinating; watching him. His bright blue eyes dart across every line, absorbing every detail- every paragraph. Before I know it, he has finished the one thousand page book and moved on to the next one. I am absolutely mesmerized.

As we sit in our secret nook in the library, I fall more and more in love with him. All the little details about him.. All his little imperfections.. I fall in love with it all…

I snuggle closer to him, closing my eyes. "Sherlock.. Can you… read to me."

It takes him a moment to process what I have said- but when he does, I feel him bring me closer to him. I rest my head on his chest, listening to his pounding heartbeat.

Sherlock's deep reading voice seems to set my body on fire, and turns me on like crazy. I don't even care about what book he's reading- all I care about is him murmuring in my ear. After a couple pages, I can't take it anymore.

"Sherlock."

"Mm?"

I move slightly so I can look at him properly. "Sherlock. Kiss me."

"John-"

"Now. Sherlock. Kiss me like it's the end of the world. Please.. I need you to kiss me like you're never going to see me again.."

Sherlock doesn't object. Quickly, he attacks my mouth with the most amazing kiss I have ever experienced. His hands are in my hair, gently pulling me to him. I lean on top of him, pressing him into the couch cushions. His hands move down my neck and onto my back. I hear the book fall to the floor, but we do not separate to pick it up.

Our hearts are beating as one; furiously and almost painfully.

"Sherlock… You're so damn sexy.. Jesus…"

"John.. I want.. God, I want all of you…"

"Sherlock.. Stay. Stay with me.."

"Always, John.. Always…"

We finally separate, but I continue to lay on top of him. Sherlock's arms hold me in a protective embrace- and I don't want him to let go.

"Sherlock.. I love you… I love you so much."

"John.. You are my light. You are part of my very being. I.. I wouldn't be here now if it wasn't for you. I know all of this happened very suddenly.. but I can't stop thinking about you, and what you do to me."

"Sherlock.. I feel the same way. I don't want to spend a day without you. I want to stay here.. in your arms. So, please.. Don't let me go…"


End file.
